Suicide, for many people, is a dirty word. It brings a plethora of discomfort along with it. It’s tragic. It’s shocking. It’s confronting. It’s extreme. It’s controversial. It’s one of the most desolate acts driven by the depths of despair. It’s surrounded with pain, shame and suffering.
I’m all too familiar with this word. It distinctly marks the time-line of my life. Sunday the 15th of May, 2005, was the day that my beloved sister killed herself. A day that played out like an unstoppable, blood chilling nightmare that gave no morning-after reprieve or relief.
I recall being with my sister for a short while that day, after she had died, surrounded by my 3 other siblings and my parents. As her lifeless body lay peacefully before me, my small mind tried to grasp the enormity of the concept that she was now in a self-inflicted eternal slumber. Her irreplaceable soul had moved on and was never coming back. In that moment, life changed irrevocably.
We often try to search for the meaning of these events. We ask ourselves – why did this have to happen? Why couldn’t I stop this? Why is this pain part of my journey? What is the reason behind it all? We can tie ourselves up in a complex web of questioning and challenging. We can be overcome with rage, anger and rebellion at the unfairness of life.
It’s in the aftermath of these major life traumas that we’re presented with the greatest potential for personal growth. We’re faced with a life-changing choice about which direction to take. Do we indulge the dark destructive side of our ego and self pity, or do we accept the silent cosmic invitation to search for divine grace?
If we choose the pursuit of grace, we soon realise that we cannot find it through reason, or logic. We cannot find it in our chattering minds or our turbulent emotions. No. Grace rests quietly within the depths of our soul. We find it in the strength of our own spirit.
My sister’s suicide marked the beginning of my pilgrimage towards that inner state of grace. I’m grateful to her for the gifts of colourful illumination and clarity that I have received along the journey, which I’ve shared below.
They are aligned to each of the seven chakras; essentially the anatomy of our spirits, our centres of spiritual power within our physical bodies.
1. Base Chakra: GET CONNECTED.
Be sure you tend to your tribe. Take time to nurture the people you love; friends and family, your chosen soul group who nourish and support you. Build the bonds with those who assure your sense of safety and belonging, and lovingly release those who don’t.
Trust and honor Mother Earth. Find security in her as a boundless source of energetic revival. Go barefoot on the grass. Enjoy the grounding effects of connecting with nature. Be amazed by its beauty. Every single day.
2. Sacral Chakra: PURSUE YOUR PASSIONS.
Access your creative centre. Be creative purely for the joy it brings you, and forego the need for external validation.
Sing, write, dance, cook, paint, draw, take photographs, whatever floats your creative boat. Just do it, regularly.
The photo above is courtesy of a lady named Dyana Griggs. This is a woman who clearly pursues her creative passion. The beauty and lifeforce she captures in her photos is breathtaking.
Your undiscovered creative passion may eventuate to be a beautiful gift to the world. Thank you, Dyana, for pursuing yours.
3. Solar Plexus: OWN YOUR POWER.
Make life giving choices and decisions that empower you and set you up for success. Talk to yourself kindly. Recognise and value your own worth. Love and accept who you are and what you can contribute to the world.
Acknowledge your own power. YOU are at the control centre of your life, no one else. Life may sometimes throw things at you that you didn’t ask for, but YOU choose how to respond. Make powerful, positive choices.
4. Heart Chakra: BE COMPASSIONATE.
A broken heart is an open heart. Many who have experienced deep loss and pain have the capacity for immense compassion. Be generous in your expression of compassion. Refrain from judging the journeys that others are on. None of us can even begin to comprehend the universal force at play in people’s lives. Give where you can, and even more where you think you can’t. It may simply be a smile, a donation, a compliment, an assurance, or it may be a lifetime of devotion. Just give, that’s how you’ll get.
5. Throat Chakra: SPEAK YOUR TRUTH.
It takes courage to be your authentic self. But remember that fortune favours the brave! A life of infinite possibility starts with the courage to recognise and pursue your own creative potential.
Be true to yourself, not to the expectations of others. Release your fear and express how you feel. Live with integrity and alignment to your core values.
6. Third Eye: BE AWARE.
Recognise that there is a higher state of consciousness where illusion falls away and recognition of real truth, beyond the mind, is accessible. When the struggle of life becomes overbearing, give over the struggle to this higher knowledge and wisdom. Trust your awareness that there is a deeper truth woven through the fabric of your life, and it is supporting you. Always.
7. Crown Chakra: SEEK & SHARE THE LIGHT.
The highest vibration of our spirituality extends beyond the intellect and permeates a universal connection. It is that which cannot be named or described. The pursuit of cosmic consciousness and being an instrument of divine light is the greatest gift that every being on this planet has the potential to experience. It is not restricted to one religion. There is no monopoly on divine love.
Just like suicide, every trauma and suffering in life presents us with the potential gift of growth. The dark night of the soul is the catalyst to search for the beauty of the cosmic light.
I’m grateful for the spiritual evolution that my dearest sister’s suicide bestowed upon me. It has undeniably made me a better woman; a stronger woman, a more compassionate and loving woman, a more conscious woman making conscious choices about how I want to live.
Am I done on my path of growth? Hell no! Do I ever deviate and head off in the wrong direction? Hell yes! But I’m committed to the path and that’s enough.
For all of you travelling this very same journey towards higher consciousness and divine grace, may the light always shine upon you.
Featured Photo Courtesy of Dyana Griggs, Copyright 2015.